Saturday, 2 August 2014
My Top 5 Dating Fails
My love life is something of a joke and has provided me and my friends with many laughs through the years. Sometimes it's got to me and made me frustrated and upset, but I'm finally over it all. I really couldn't care less about love and it feels incredibly enlightening and free. I'm no longer searching, I'm enjoying the years I have by myself and the freedom that entails. Anyway, I'm only 24! Who says you have to have it all figured out by now?
So I thought it was finally time I wrote a blog documenting my many many failures in the dating world. I've previously shied away from this kind of blog because I didn't want to scare away any potential suitors, but I really don't care anymore. If it scares you off, you're probably not the right one for me anyway.
So in no particular order, here are just some of my many dating fails.
1. "I'm busy for the foreseeable future"
A favourite of mine, a guy once let me know he was no longer interested by telling me he was busy. Actually now he thought about it, he was 'busy for the foreseeable future'. How do you take something like that? Well when you get no correspondence following that, I'd say that's a brush off. Ladies, if a man says he is busy and goes quiet…run. This happened to me once again when somebody else was persistently busy and when I quoted this previous brush off…they admitted that was the case. So I've been given the whole 'I'm busy' speech TWICE. The 'He's Just Not That Into You' lesson from Sex and the City applies here.
I once went on a date with a guy from a dating site and I thought the date went brilliantly. That was until I checked WhatsApp the next day to find out I had been blocked with no explanation. A simple no would have sufficed.
3. MySpace Dumping
This ones a bit old school. A guy I dated in college refused to acknowledge me in public. This meant if we passed each other in the corridor, he would simply nod or look at me in a slightly embarrassed way. We once went on a date and whenever we entered somewhere where one of his friends worked, he would promptly drop my hand. Eventually I got bit tired of this crap and called him out on his behaviour with a lengthy MySpace message. Later that night I went out with friends and got a text saying 'Did you just dump me? ON MYSPACE?' - my bad.
4. The Inappropriate Crushes
A Stacey speciality, I have an uncanny ability to form attractions to men I can never have. They might have a girlfriend, they might be interested in somebody else or they might just not like me back. Whichever category they fall in, it's likely that I will form some sort of inappropriate obsessive crush on them and inevitably end up getting hurt. To be honest, I'd like this to stay as a pre-twenties problem I had. During this somewhat destructive period of my life, I would be convinced that my crush would eventually come to a head and the guy would realise I was who he'd been looking for. I'd be a complete pushover in denial and usually take whatever chance I could for a stolen kiss with my crush and then be shocked when nothing developed. I'd like to think I moved on from this messy period because girl doesn't want to get into that again. The lesson here is, if it doesn't look like it's going to happen, it won't. Get over it quickly.
5. "I don't know if I cba to meet up again"
Yes this was actually said to me. If somebody can't be arsed to see you, let along use full words, it's a lucky escape. The sooner men learn to be straight to the point and tactical - the better.
If anything my experiences have taught me it's that you just need to brush yourself off and move on. I've learned to laugh at my experiences rather than cry and it's made me feel more free than ever. When your friends are all in serious relationships, it can sometimes feel like you're getting left behind, but love isn't a race. I went through a period of trying to look, but now I couldn't care less. When it happens, it happens and I'm done putting up with mediocre men. I'm sure many more dating fails are ahead of me, but they'll just add to my experience and hilarious anecdotes with friends.