Sunday, 27 April 2014

The Pros and Cons of Living Alone

Has it really been six months since I last blogged? I'm the worst blogger that ever blogged…or rather didn't. I keep saying I'm going to take blogging seriously, then next thing I know, months have passed and this blog lies neglected. But I'm feeling inspired and productive for the first time in ages so…who knows.

So since I last blogged, I've moved from a house share to a studio flat and now live alone. Living alone in something I've always wanted because it's fair to say all prior house sharing arrangements have ended or resulted in disaster and the loss of my sanity. So I searched and searched for the perfect affordable little studio and its existence almost seemed mythical…when finally…when I was about to give up all hope…my little flat hit the market and I bagged a viewing before anybody beat me to the bloody thing.

I've been in my new abode for two weeks and have had to get to grips with all manner of grown up tasks such as sorting out all my individual bills, keeping the place tidy and working out my escape plan if I ever come face to face with a spider. I'm pretty impressed with how I've handled actual adult tasks and now all that awaits is the plethora of bills landing on my doormat or my email inbox and thus draining my account. So many direct debits…

Many people ask me if I get lonely or scared living alone and the answer is 'Yes, of course', but thankfully I've always been someone that's content with my own company and never needed the company of others to feel sane or alive. I'm pretty used to my own company, I've never had mountains of friends that I've seen everyday and I've never had a boyfriend - so it's never felt odd being left to my own devices.

Thankfully my studio is petite in size, much like me. So it doesn't feel like I'm rattling around a big old house and wondering what every sound is. Which I was pretty much doing for the last month of my house share. It's so petite in fact that my bed comes out of the wall, a la 2 Broke Girls.

I've had a ball having my own space to decorate and furnish how I want. I've become a homeware fiend and it has just given me another reason to fuel my crippling shopping addiction more. I find myself drooling over glassware, mugs, furniture and ornaments. I have a dressing table on my list of things to save and buy even! I'm pouring over home magazines. I am a woman homeware possessed. But thanks to ma petit apartment, I've had to keep it somewhat on hold and within reason. So far, my bargain mason drinking jugs are my most prised possession.

Mess was always a huge issue with previous shares, but living alone means that all the mess is mine. I'm responsible and there is no blame game. I make a mess, I clean it, the job is done. So I can be as lazy or proactive as I want and there is no argument or frustration to anyone but me. The size of the place also means that cleaning takes no time at all, so there is no real excuse for skipping my chores.

Carrying on this theme, I can do whatever I bloody well want to. I can watch what I like on the telly, have a movie marathon, lay in bed catching up on Youtube, dance around with the music up, bake, try out new recipes, take a late or early shower, invite people over and ANSWER TO NO ONE.

But it's not all tea and cake…(but it mostly rules), because of course I do get a bit bored and lonely. I've taken to baking a lot of late because I'm at a loss what to do. When I get visitors, I don't really want them to leave, because it's nice having the company and seeing another human being. Don't get me wrong, I am a bit of a loner, but I'm not a total anti-social hermit. I love talking to people! I find myself trying to be the perfect host to make them stay longer! It's not like I can walking into a communal area and just start chatting shit for ages, there is nobody around for that anymore! People aren't always available for a phone call. But by keeping myself busy, which is also pro-active and stops me getting down on myself, then it can become something I won't notice as much.

For the first time in ages, I actually feel happy and content.