Wednesday 30 December 2009

Yes I'm still alive.

In case any of you were wondering if I'd fallen off the face of the planet, I'd like to inform you that I'm still alive and kicking.

The months between September and December were a complete blur. I'm now the deputy style editor of The Linc, my university's newspaper. So on top of a complete overload of university coursework, I've had that to contend with. Year two is a right slap in the face, how I'll deal with my third is beyond me.

However despite my complete lack of free time, I've enjoyed meeting new people and making new friends. I love being part of something I'm proud of, check out www.thelinc.co.uk to see our work.

So as the new year (and a new decade) beckons, it's promotes a feeling of nostalgia among us all. I can't believe I'm seeing my second decade in, and my teenage years will come to an end in May. However, I act like an OAP anyway, so getting old is nothing to worry about.

I think come May I will write a blog about how my teenage years have passed me by without a my first love, that I dreamed about in so many Sarra Manning novels. 2009 has yet again not been my year, but this is the year I got almost used to it. However, I will not be complacent.

Instead I'm dreaming big, this year my mum wanted to go to Australia and she did it. It's prompted me to do the same, I want go to New York, and I'm going to do it. Saving money has never ever been my strong point, but I need to go on an adventure and for a single journalist, New York is the ideal. Perhaps as product of watching too much 'Sex and the city' and romantic comedies, but New York seems like the place to me. Shopping anyone?

I've always championed women being strong and independent, that we don't have to flaunt ourselves and mess with our looks to get somewhere in the world. That with intelligence alone, we can achieve want we want and take opportunities.

It doesn't always work that way, I know the world doesn't. But it should. This year I let men get me down, and make me feel bad about myself. I let myself feel worthless because I wasn't what they wanted, and because I yet again met myself with unrequited love.

Next year, I'm going to try hard to not let that happen again. Women, we are strong and independent, we don't need men to determine how we feel about ourselves. If we don't love ourselves, nobody will. Yes, its psychiatric bullshit, but maybe some positive thinking in this depressing climate will give us all a kick up the arse.

I'm working tomorrow night, so another anticlimactic new years is on the cards, but here's to 2010 and many more opportunities.

Next year, I'm going to try to live my life to the full. My own way.